Now… I start this Retro Rocks Review knowing full well that I am opening you all up to the sad, pathetic loser that I was (arguably still am) back in the ’80s. I mean, anyone who spends their formative years playing a game called Strip Poker (and Strip Poker II) is always going to get what he slash she deserves.

(in this case, mostly “he”)

I’m also guessing that for the majority of gamers reading this, I’m going to have to explain exactly why said pathetic loser, way too horny for his own good, was playing a game of Strip Poker on an 8-bit platform, with graphics like this:

After all… porn has always been readily available, right?

Well, no… there used to be a time when the Internet did not exist in households, and poor, horny 15 year olds like yours truly, too gutless to buy a mag or VHS from a shop, resorted to playing a little game called Strip Poker II on the Commodore 64 in order to see naked women.

I know, sad, pathetic, but true 😉

The thing is though, despite the seedy nature behind why I was playing the game, I actually really enjoyed the challenge of this game. It was straight 5-card poker against a variety of opponents with varying poker skills. The “easy” girl (for lack of a better term) was easy to beat, the difficult one was bloody tough.

All girls had quips too… funny comebacks that, in the heat of the moment, would make you laugh.

And this little game wasn’t the lone ranger. A massive (yes we said “massive”) pop star in the ’80s called Samantha Fox had her own version that went on to reveal her very own ‘asset’s if you beat her, and there was also a black and white version of a Strip Poker game that, for the life of me, I can’t remember the name of.

Sort of a metaphor for my life… sort of.

There was also apparently a male version… not that there’s anything wrong with that?

Male Strip Poker on Game On


Pete and I have discussed this in a previous podcast and again, I’m going to mention it. It may never happen in this day and age, but us adult gamers should be catered for a little more when it comes to these sorts of games… on consoles I mean.

I’d love to play a 2018 version of Strip Poker with ripping graphics and sizzling repartee… not the seedy kind you can play online for money… rather, a game with a bit of a sense of humour and something for all tastes.

Same with Leisure Suit Larry… I’d bloody love to see a 2018 or beyond version of that game… can you even imagine?

I’d love to know whether any devs have something like this on the cards?

Pun intended!


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Written by: @dantheinternut